I had surgery last week, and my daughter announced to the entire soccer field: "My mom can't come to practice today because she is doing a poop test." I had to do colon prep, and wasn't physically able to make it away from the bathroom. I told her that I needed to stay close to the bathroom, and her interpretation was that I was doing a "poop test." Kids seem to have a knack for spreading family secrets and having a slightly skewed interpretation of our conversations. So if you ever meet up with one of my children and they tell you something, be wary of the source. Take their translations with a grain of salt.
Parents: "I'm not sleeping. I'm resting my eyes."
Kids' Interpretation: "My mom takes a LOT of naps."
Parents: "I don't have any money."
Kids' Interpretation: "My parents are poor."
Parents: "Sometimes grown-ups yell, but they still love each other."
Kids' Interpretation: "My mom and dad yell a lot and say bad words."
Parents: "I don't have time for that right now."
Kids' Interpretation: "My mom works all the time and NEVER plays with me."